if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
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I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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