wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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