you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
