Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
