he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
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