Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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