Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
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