Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize