Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
