the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
My life is pants optional.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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