At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
