whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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