she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Dignity is for republicans.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
