There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
high people should be assigned attendants
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
