Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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