he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize