You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize