Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
