eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
