just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize