Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
