I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
