My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I stole a fireplace last night.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
