dude i'm inner monologue high
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
