don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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