weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
