i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Randomize
