i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
