Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
