i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
