I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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