Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
