Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
