he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
