i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
My ass is underappreciated
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
