I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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