I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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