he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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