I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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