Whod you bang
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Randomize
