Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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