I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
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the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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