i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
It's shark week go big or go home
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
