Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
It's no shave November. This is our time.
We are all done wearing pants today
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize