all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
