so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
