after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
