dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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