Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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