I wish I could teleport
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
