I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
