I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
